Thursday, December 19, 2013
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
Top 10 Christmas Gifts
Top Ten Christmas Gifts:
10. Boundaries. Telling a child where they can and cannot go sets a foundation of security. "Someone cares enough about me to not want me to get hurt, even though I'm going to grumble and whine about them being 'bossy'." They will get over the bossiness, but they won't get over the fact that you care.
9. Questions. "Who will you be with, where will you be, and what time will you be home?" Nothing wrong with them, and nothing like having to be accountable to mom and dad to teach them that they must be accountable ALL their lives and not shove things off on someone else.
8. Bed times. Ever been to the store with a self-absorbed mother and a whining child after 10:00 p.m. at night? Crying, whining, rubbing eyes and blubbering--they are TIRED. Their little bodies and minds NEED rest. A quiet dark room with a bed and covers and security surrounding them. To hell with the latest sale. If it's not there in the morning chances are you didn't need it to begin with.
7. Good hygiene guidelines. I distinctly remember a little girl in the second grade that smelled like soiled underwear and body odor. At age six, Alison was wearing deodorant because she needed it. As long as you can find running water and can buy a bar of soap, you can be clean. It's up to you to teach them how.
6. Good grammar. You can be beautiful and well dressed, but if you want to “axe” a question ‘cause you "seen" something and are "orientated" with the neighborhood, hang it up. You sound Walmart and your children don't need to sound like you. Read a book and learn to speak properly.
5. Don't gossip. I grew up with a mother that gossiped about everyone in the family, neighborhood, street, town, county--you get the picture. Thank God for my husband that taught me that it cheapens me to talk about others and God's not too happy with gossips either. Don't believe me? Check it out in the Bible. It's right there, and it's a really crappy way for adults to behave. I quit, she hasn't. I'm happy, she's not.
4. Pay attention to your kids. I'm willing to bet if you asked your daughter if she wanted a trip to the toy store or an afternoon with mom pretending you're at a spa doing nails and hair she'd opt for the latter and not the former. Toys end up in a a heap, eventually not looked at. Memories are treasured and taken out over a lifetime, looked over, and cherished.
3. Parent vs. Friend. I have told both my girls, "I am your parent, not your friend. If we survive your childhood, I'm sure we will be good friends one day." They don't want a friend. They want a parent. There is security there, for both of you.
2. Things vs. Love. There is no store-bought item that can say "I Love You" but you can. And mean it. Look your kid in the eye, even if it embarrasses them, and say, "I love you." They will never forget it.
1. Listen. You can't gift-wrap your ear, but that is a huge gift. Just sitting down and listening to them. Turn off the television, cell phone, stereo, computer, everything. Just have a conversation and really LISTEN to them. Sometimes without even coming out and saying anything they can be asking for help, attention, direction, anything--but you don't hear it if you don't LISTEN.
So if you're worried about what to get your kids for Christmas, look list over. It's all free. One size fits all. No return line. No duplication worries. And they're good 365 days out of the year.
10. Boundaries. Telling a child where they can and cannot go sets a foundation of security. "Someone cares enough about me to not want me to get hurt, even though I'm going to grumble and whine about them being 'bossy'." They will get over the bossiness, but they won't get over the fact that you care.
9. Questions. "Who will you be with, where will you be, and what time will you be home?" Nothing wrong with them, and nothing like having to be accountable to mom and dad to teach them that they must be accountable ALL their lives and not shove things off on someone else.
8. Bed times. Ever been to the store with a self-absorbed mother and a whining child after 10:00 p.m. at night? Crying, whining, rubbing eyes and blubbering--they are TIRED. Their little bodies and minds NEED rest. A quiet dark room with a bed and covers and security surrounding them. To hell with the latest sale. If it's not there in the morning chances are you didn't need it to begin with.
7. Good hygiene guidelines. I distinctly remember a little girl in the second grade that smelled like soiled underwear and body odor. At age six, Alison was wearing deodorant because she needed it. As long as you can find running water and can buy a bar of soap, you can be clean. It's up to you to teach them how.
6. Good grammar. You can be beautiful and well dressed, but if you want to “axe” a question ‘cause you "seen" something and are "orientated" with the neighborhood, hang it up. You sound Walmart and your children don't need to sound like you. Read a book and learn to speak properly.
5. Don't gossip. I grew up with a mother that gossiped about everyone in the family, neighborhood, street, town, county--you get the picture. Thank God for my husband that taught me that it cheapens me to talk about others and God's not too happy with gossips either. Don't believe me? Check it out in the Bible. It's right there, and it's a really crappy way for adults to behave. I quit, she hasn't. I'm happy, she's not.
4. Pay attention to your kids. I'm willing to bet if you asked your daughter if she wanted a trip to the toy store or an afternoon with mom pretending you're at a spa doing nails and hair she'd opt for the latter and not the former. Toys end up in a a heap, eventually not looked at. Memories are treasured and taken out over a lifetime, looked over, and cherished.
3. Parent vs. Friend. I have told both my girls, "I am your parent, not your friend. If we survive your childhood, I'm sure we will be good friends one day." They don't want a friend. They want a parent. There is security there, for both of you.
2. Things vs. Love. There is no store-bought item that can say "I Love You" but you can. And mean it. Look your kid in the eye, even if it embarrasses them, and say, "I love you." They will never forget it.
1. Listen. You can't gift-wrap your ear, but that is a huge gift. Just sitting down and listening to them. Turn off the television, cell phone, stereo, computer, everything. Just have a conversation and really LISTEN to them. Sometimes without even coming out and saying anything they can be asking for help, attention, direction, anything--but you don't hear it if you don't LISTEN.
So if you're worried about what to get your kids for Christmas, look list over. It's all free. One size fits all. No return line. No duplication worries. And they're good 365 days out of the year.
Fresh Start
December 6: You
all know how I love to give God the glory when He blesses us! Today we
woke up chilly and wondering what was happening with getting a new
furnace, we faced snow outside and COLD temperatures, yet we all slept
well, stayed warm, and were alive for another day! We will be getting a
brand new furnace at noon tomorrow and I do believe that God allowed
this short delay so as to bring my attention to all the goodness He can give you if you are willing to wait on Him.
A client of mine paid me this morning and I was a woman on a mission. We have a beautiful fireplace and no wood, so as I drove off to get some groceries, I called a local tree service that sells cords of wood from trees they cut down. They had no seasoned cords but was I aware that Marion County Juvenile Department had firewood for sale? I wasn't but now I am and I am here to toot a horn for Fresh Start Market and Espresso.
Located on Center Street in Salem just down a block or so from Oregon State Hospital (where One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest was filmed 40+ years ago), Fresh Start is in a darling little building next door to a juvenile correctional facility. R&R Tree Service, the company I'd originally called for firewood, donates some of their wood to this business to sell either in cords or by cart. Carts are four feet long, three feet high, and a foot deep for $35; I bought two carts of wood. A young man named Jacob loaded the wood into the back of the Dodge for me. Inside Fresh Start is a little cafe/coffee shop. All the workers there are juvenile offenders that are on probation. Everything they earn working there goes to pay restitution for their crimes until it's paid in full. Jacob was SO polite, very hard working, very pleasant. I told him I was really proud of him, and that I didn't mind patronizing this business if it meant encouraging him and other juvenile offenders to stay on the straight path and not end up at the prison. I told him about Mike and that he'd worked in four max prisons and would do anything to see kids get going down the right path and leaving a life of crime. Some other business has donated Christmas trees and they range in price from $5-$40 and Jacob was only too happy to show me a few of them. The menu for the cafe is small and simple, just enough to create the basics but excellent prices and all made by the kids. This entire operation is overseen by adults. The cafe was clean, organized, and full of customers, which was nice to see. They sell seasonal produce which is either grown in their gardens or purchased from local farmers. They have a summer plant sale including large hanging baskets, as well as cedar planters, garden art, holiday gifts, and recycled wood and metal art made by the youth there. Their address is 3020 Center Street, Salem, 503.585.4956.
One of the sweetest compliments my husband has ever given me was that I'm his ideal of the Proverbs 31 woman. High praise from a man that has hated women most of his life because of his childhood and first marriage. It was such a wonderful feeling to get paid by a client and be able to go find the firewood, on my own and bring it home to warm up the house. Groceries purchased, firewood stacked (Alison--what a little trooper, helping me unload and stack in 25 degree weather. Couldn't have done it without her.) Tonight, the house is toasty, a beautiful fire going, husband showered, leg, dressed and bandaged, you'd never know the furnace is dead, it's so warm in here thanks to Him leading me to Fresh Start. His provision is always just PERFECT for what we need.
A client of mine paid me this morning and I was a woman on a mission. We have a beautiful fireplace and no wood, so as I drove off to get some groceries, I called a local tree service that sells cords of wood from trees they cut down. They had no seasoned cords but was I aware that Marion County Juvenile Department had firewood for sale? I wasn't but now I am and I am here to toot a horn for Fresh Start Market and Espresso.
Located on Center Street in Salem just down a block or so from Oregon State Hospital (where One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest was filmed 40+ years ago), Fresh Start is in a darling little building next door to a juvenile correctional facility. R&R Tree Service, the company I'd originally called for firewood, donates some of their wood to this business to sell either in cords or by cart. Carts are four feet long, three feet high, and a foot deep for $35; I bought two carts of wood. A young man named Jacob loaded the wood into the back of the Dodge for me. Inside Fresh Start is a little cafe/coffee shop. All the workers there are juvenile offenders that are on probation. Everything they earn working there goes to pay restitution for their crimes until it's paid in full. Jacob was SO polite, very hard working, very pleasant. I told him I was really proud of him, and that I didn't mind patronizing this business if it meant encouraging him and other juvenile offenders to stay on the straight path and not end up at the prison. I told him about Mike and that he'd worked in four max prisons and would do anything to see kids get going down the right path and leaving a life of crime. Some other business has donated Christmas trees and they range in price from $5-$40 and Jacob was only too happy to show me a few of them. The menu for the cafe is small and simple, just enough to create the basics but excellent prices and all made by the kids. This entire operation is overseen by adults. The cafe was clean, organized, and full of customers, which was nice to see. They sell seasonal produce which is either grown in their gardens or purchased from local farmers. They have a summer plant sale including large hanging baskets, as well as cedar planters, garden art, holiday gifts, and recycled wood and metal art made by the youth there. Their address is 3020 Center Street, Salem, 503.585.4956.
One of the sweetest compliments my husband has ever given me was that I'm his ideal of the Proverbs 31 woman. High praise from a man that has hated women most of his life because of his childhood and first marriage. It was such a wonderful feeling to get paid by a client and be able to go find the firewood, on my own and bring it home to warm up the house. Groceries purchased, firewood stacked (Alison--what a little trooper, helping me unload and stack in 25 degree weather. Couldn't have done it without her.) Tonight, the house is toasty, a beautiful fire going, husband showered, leg, dressed and bandaged, you'd never know the furnace is dead, it's so warm in here thanks to Him leading me to Fresh Start. His provision is always just PERFECT for what we need.
Stupid n****r
One of my sweet co-workers experienced firsthand the beauty of the holidays and the gentle heart of the American consumer on Sunday.
He was working the register and had a really mouthy, awful young woman, about early 20's or so, and she apparently was with her mother who'd been rude to Eric before on another trip to Michaels. Mom was roaming the store while her daughter was paying for her items. This young lady was giving Eric an attitude about a part of her purchase and he apologized. She was mouthy, telling him to shut up, quit saying you're sorry you're just sounding stupid, to which he apologized AGAIN, this went on a couple of times, he's a really sweet kid and was totally blown away by her rudeness. Her mom walks up to the register and asks her daughter if she was having trouble.
"I wouldn't be but this stupid n****r is pissing me off."
Out. Loud. Eric is black. One of the SWEETEST guys you will ever meet. We get along fabulously, he's a hard worker, studying to be a nurse to work with the elderly. And he was absolutely crushed. We had a chat about this last night. I told him that there are ugly people everywhere, she was ugly before she walked in the store, you just happened to see the side that day and you can't take it personally, she probably treats everyone she encounters this way. Just look at people like that right in the eye and tell them, "Well, God bless you! He loves you, too!" They won't know how to handle it and you will totally knock them off course.
Last evening one of the girls in the floral department had to get on the speaker and kindly ask people to NOT let their children race around the store with merchandise in their hands and PLEASE do not let them lay on the floor and roll round and LICK the floor. Honest to Pete, you have to ask people to not let their kids LICK the floor. I found three carts of merchandise last night, packed to the gills and overflowing with items that people had picked up through the store and then DITCHED. I often wonder how they'd feel if we showed up at their door, helped ourselves inside, and then went room-to-room picking up their belongings in one room and leaving it in another, dumping it on the floor, tossing it in a corner--destruction is always easy when you don't have to clean it up.
If you want to see the worst of mankind, go to a store during the holidays. If you want to see the best of mankind, go to a store during the holidays. You see and hear things you never thought possible. There are some people that you just want to toss a slab of raw meat to and hope you pull back all your fingers. Then there are those, like the ragged biker and his girlfriend, that cried while telling me about their biker club president who'd died at the age of 33 from heart disease and "I looked at his face after he died and I saw the face of a man that had seen the face of Jesus when he went Home!" It blows your mind--the vastness of personalities and attitudes, the ugly and beautiful, every letter of the alphabet from A-Z that describes the human race walks through those doors.
To hurl a racial epithet at a young man that is putting himself through college and working his tail off like the rest of us is to crawl on the elevator of attitude and descend three floors below human. For every jerk that comes in the store there are 10 lovely people and I'm sure escorts would have been climbing over each other to escort her out the doors. Eric was absolutely crestfallen but I told him this won't be the last time someone looks at the color of your skin and says something horrible to you, sad as it is, but you have to pull yourself together, hold your head high, and not let their ignorance dictate how you face life.
Festering jackasses have been around since the dawn of man. Look at Cain. We have gone from a man killing his brother in a field over a fit of jealousy to black kids racing up to people and slamming them in the head so hard they pass out, or in some cases, die of their injuries, and I'm not being racist, every episode of this behavior caught on camera shows the perps to be black and the victims to be white. Just the facts, ma'am, and video doesn't lie. Does a white woman calling a black man a stupid n****r trump a black kid hitting a white woman so hard she dies of brain injuries? No. The enemy walks among us like a roaring lion looking to destroy us, whether with words or fists irregardless of color. When you walk through life with a moral ambiguity, afraid to take a stand lest you offend someone you will be a target, behavior like this will continue. If you see behavior like this, do you take a stand and call that person out? Or do you swallow yourself and walk away, knowing someone else will have to wade through the carnage of someone's feelings crushed by words or property being destroyed or people being put out by a child's behavior? I would hope I have the moral conviction if that should happen again to grab the phone, activate the store loud speaker, and inform the buying public there is an ignorant young woman at register five that has called my co-worker a racial epithet and would anyone volunteer to show this young woman the door and make it clear she is to never return again? Do you say something to a parent who's letting their child destroy public property or hinder someone walking down an aisle because the child is throwing store merchandise across the aisles or running dangerously around corners and could bump an older person and knock them over? Does this behavior stop when we stop crawling inside our safe place to hide and start standing up and saying and doing what's right? To not say anything is to endorse such behavior.
Now, what are you willing to do?
He was working the register and had a really mouthy, awful young woman, about early 20's or so, and she apparently was with her mother who'd been rude to Eric before on another trip to Michaels. Mom was roaming the store while her daughter was paying for her items. This young lady was giving Eric an attitude about a part of her purchase and he apologized. She was mouthy, telling him to shut up, quit saying you're sorry you're just sounding stupid, to which he apologized AGAIN, this went on a couple of times, he's a really sweet kid and was totally blown away by her rudeness. Her mom walks up to the register and asks her daughter if she was having trouble.
"I wouldn't be but this stupid n****r is pissing me off."
Out. Loud. Eric is black. One of the SWEETEST guys you will ever meet. We get along fabulously, he's a hard worker, studying to be a nurse to work with the elderly. And he was absolutely crushed. We had a chat about this last night. I told him that there are ugly people everywhere, she was ugly before she walked in the store, you just happened to see the side that day and you can't take it personally, she probably treats everyone she encounters this way. Just look at people like that right in the eye and tell them, "Well, God bless you! He loves you, too!" They won't know how to handle it and you will totally knock them off course.
Last evening one of the girls in the floral department had to get on the speaker and kindly ask people to NOT let their children race around the store with merchandise in their hands and PLEASE do not let them lay on the floor and roll round and LICK the floor. Honest to Pete, you have to ask people to not let their kids LICK the floor. I found three carts of merchandise last night, packed to the gills and overflowing with items that people had picked up through the store and then DITCHED. I often wonder how they'd feel if we showed up at their door, helped ourselves inside, and then went room-to-room picking up their belongings in one room and leaving it in another, dumping it on the floor, tossing it in a corner--destruction is always easy when you don't have to clean it up.
If you want to see the worst of mankind, go to a store during the holidays. If you want to see the best of mankind, go to a store during the holidays. You see and hear things you never thought possible. There are some people that you just want to toss a slab of raw meat to and hope you pull back all your fingers. Then there are those, like the ragged biker and his girlfriend, that cried while telling me about their biker club president who'd died at the age of 33 from heart disease and "I looked at his face after he died and I saw the face of a man that had seen the face of Jesus when he went Home!" It blows your mind--the vastness of personalities and attitudes, the ugly and beautiful, every letter of the alphabet from A-Z that describes the human race walks through those doors.
To hurl a racial epithet at a young man that is putting himself through college and working his tail off like the rest of us is to crawl on the elevator of attitude and descend three floors below human. For every jerk that comes in the store there are 10 lovely people and I'm sure escorts would have been climbing over each other to escort her out the doors. Eric was absolutely crestfallen but I told him this won't be the last time someone looks at the color of your skin and says something horrible to you, sad as it is, but you have to pull yourself together, hold your head high, and not let their ignorance dictate how you face life.
Festering jackasses have been around since the dawn of man. Look at Cain. We have gone from a man killing his brother in a field over a fit of jealousy to black kids racing up to people and slamming them in the head so hard they pass out, or in some cases, die of their injuries, and I'm not being racist, every episode of this behavior caught on camera shows the perps to be black and the victims to be white. Just the facts, ma'am, and video doesn't lie. Does a white woman calling a black man a stupid n****r trump a black kid hitting a white woman so hard she dies of brain injuries? No. The enemy walks among us like a roaring lion looking to destroy us, whether with words or fists irregardless of color. When you walk through life with a moral ambiguity, afraid to take a stand lest you offend someone you will be a target, behavior like this will continue. If you see behavior like this, do you take a stand and call that person out? Or do you swallow yourself and walk away, knowing someone else will have to wade through the carnage of someone's feelings crushed by words or property being destroyed or people being put out by a child's behavior? I would hope I have the moral conviction if that should happen again to grab the phone, activate the store loud speaker, and inform the buying public there is an ignorant young woman at register five that has called my co-worker a racial epithet and would anyone volunteer to show this young woman the door and make it clear she is to never return again? Do you say something to a parent who's letting their child destroy public property or hinder someone walking down an aisle because the child is throwing store merchandise across the aisles or running dangerously around corners and could bump an older person and knock them over? Does this behavior stop when we stop crawling inside our safe place to hide and start standing up and saying and doing what's right? To not say anything is to endorse such behavior.
Now, what are you willing to do?
Sunday, December 1, 2013
To be a storm in Oregon...
This weather--has Oregon weather become like Oregon residents?
"I don't know what I want to do! Do I want to rage through here and bring 100 mph winds and blow leaves and limbs everywhere? Do I want to be politically correct and blow up to an intersection and hem and haw and not insult the other winds and wait until someone motions me to blow through so I don't look like I actually WANT to blow through? Do I blow over and rain on conservatives to appease the flaming libs? Or do I want to blow over and rain on libs and make the conservatives happy? Do I want to unleash total destruction and cause the state government to spend tax payer dollars on something besides the failed Cover Oregon plan and giving illegal aliens driver permits, or do I just blow ENOUGH destruction so that all those horrible, piggish Obama haters have to leave the comfort of their homes and go rake leaves out of their neighbors yards?
Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooh, what do I do? Decisions, decisions, decisions! (Much swirling around in place of hand-wringing....)
In the end I think I'll just gust up like I mean business and then act like an impotent ass and just blow a lot of stuff around. Oh, to be a storm in Oregon......."
"I don't know what I want to do! Do I want to rage through here and bring 100 mph winds and blow leaves and limbs everywhere? Do I want to be politically correct and blow up to an intersection and hem and haw and not insult the other winds and wait until someone motions me to blow through so I don't look like I actually WANT to blow through? Do I blow over and rain on conservatives to appease the flaming libs? Or do I want to blow over and rain on libs and make the conservatives happy? Do I want to unleash total destruction and cause the state government to spend tax payer dollars on something besides the failed Cover Oregon plan and giving illegal aliens driver permits, or do I just blow ENOUGH destruction so that all those horrible, piggish Obama haters have to leave the comfort of their homes and go rake leaves out of their neighbors yards?
Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooh, what do I do? Decisions, decisions, decisions! (Much swirling around in place of hand-wringing....)
In the end I think I'll just gust up like I mean business and then act like an impotent ass and just blow a lot of stuff around. Oh, to be a storm in Oregon......."
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