Top Ten Christmas Gifts:
10. Boundaries. Telling a child where they can and cannot go sets a
foundation of security. "Someone cares enough about me to not want me to
get hurt, even though I'm going to grumble and whine about them being
'bossy'." They will get over the bossiness, but they won't get over the
fact that you care.
9. Questions. "Who will you be with, where will you be, and what time will
you be home?" Nothing wrong with them, and nothing like having to be
accountable to mom and dad to teach them that they must be accountable
ALL their lives and not shove things off on someone else.
8.
Bed times. Ever been to the store with a self-absorbed mother and a
whining child after 10:00 p.m. at night? Crying, whining, rubbing eyes
and blubbering--they are TIRED. Their little bodies and minds NEED rest.
A quiet dark room with a bed and covers and security surrounding them.
To hell with the latest sale. If it's not there in the morning chances
are you didn't need it to begin with.
7. Good hygiene
guidelines. I distinctly remember a little girl in the second grade that
smelled like soiled underwear and body odor. At age six, Alison was
wearing deodorant because she needed it. As long as you can find running
water and can buy a bar of soap, you can be clean. It's up to you to
teach them how.
6. Good grammar. You can be beautiful and well
dressed, but if you want to “axe” a question ‘cause you "seen" something
and are "orientated" with the neighborhood, hang it up. You sound
Walmart and your children don't need to sound like you. Read a book and
learn to speak properly.
5. Don't gossip. I grew up with a
mother that gossiped about everyone in the family, neighborhood, street,
town, county--you get the picture. Thank God for my husband that taught
me that it cheapens me to talk about others and God's not too happy
with gossips either. Don't believe me? Check it out in the Bible. It's
right there, and it's a really crappy way for adults to behave. I quit,
she hasn't. I'm happy, she's not.
4. Pay attention to your
kids. I'm willing to bet if you asked your daughter if she wanted a
trip to the toy store or an afternoon with mom pretending you're at a
spa doing nails and hair she'd opt for the latter and not the former.
Toys end up in a a heap, eventually not looked at. Memories are
treasured and taken out over a lifetime, looked over, and cherished.
3. Parent vs. Friend. I have told both my girls, "I am your parent, not
your friend. If we survive your childhood, I'm sure we will be good
friends one day." They don't want a friend. They want a parent. There is
security there, for both of you.
2. Things vs. Love. There is
no store-bought item that can say "I Love You" but you can. And mean it.
Look your kid in the eye, even if it embarrasses them, and say, "I love
you." They will never forget it.
1. Listen. You can't
gift-wrap your ear, but that is a huge gift. Just sitting down and
listening to them. Turn off the television, cell phone, stereo,
computer, everything. Just have a conversation and really LISTEN to
them. Sometimes without even coming out and saying anything they can be
asking for help, attention, direction, anything--but you don't hear it
if you don't LISTEN.
So if you're worried about what to get
your kids for Christmas, look list over. It's all free. One size fits
all. No return line. No duplication worries. And they're good 365 days
out of the year.
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