Hello to all of you and in the name of Jesus, I wish you all peace, even as insane as this world is. As most of you know, this blog is Lori's doing. She's so much better at the electronic world and typing and if it were left to me, my cell phone that only takes and sends calls and text messages, I wouldn't even have that. It is through her that I communicate with everyone, for the most part.
The Lord has put on my heart the following things that I'm going to say to you here. I don't know for sure how many of you are that are out there, but I am so grateful and feel such honor and humility for all the prayers and spiritual support I've received that I feel the need to share this with you also. It seems that I have become just slightly left of humble with regard to all that I have been through with my leg. It was brought to my attention through the Holy Spirit that I have gotten spiritually lazy and have not exactly lived up to what I asked of Him to do through me, so I need to apologize to all of you that have taken so much time to pray and keep me in your prayers. Understand, I haven't been doing bad things with my time, I have sort of fallen into a rut of predictability.
Every other day go in to have the dressings changed, listen to the nurses that, don't get me wrong--I have great admiration and respect for--tell me what a great job I'm doing. For the longest time, I would deflect any praise from me and lay it all at the feet of my Savior, Jesus Christ. I hadn't been spending as much time in the Word of God as I should have, and I quit deflecting the praise for my progress. It wasn't that I meant to, and nor has it ever entered my mind to usurp the glory and the praiseworthiness of my Savior for getting me this far. I just out-and-out got lazy. I have also suffered with a restlessness, I think even a little prideful, attitude. Things like, "I have repairs that need to be made to my truck," which is our only source of transportation right now. I have a fall and winter's worth of neglect to our property that I need to fix. So instead of keeping my eyes on Jesus and resting in the security of an all-powerful and all-knowing Savior, I was trying again to do the heavy lifting myself and I also found that I lost the fellowship that I'd had before. The reason why I'm apologizing to all of you is that I feel like I have insulted and wasted all of your precious prayers that you have given on my behalf and for me, with my years of military and law enforcement, comes my sense of honor and duty and I feel that by not living up to the things I've said earlier, about how Jesus has been the one to spare my life and my leg. I found myself giving in to frustration and trying to move my way on my own understanding and my own strength. For that, I am truly sorry to both my Lord and Savior, and to you folks, who I hardly know personally many of you. I know Adrian Bateman, my Ontario connection, and maybe a few others, and you know who you are. I am still humbled and most grateful for the prayers and support from all of you, and I would like to reiterate the fact that time is running short on this Age of Grace that we find ourselves in, and I intend to renew my drive to serve God, which is what got this whole thing started in the first place. I wanted Him to use me in a way to testify and bring more people into the Kingdom. So, if there are any of you out there who are either riding the fence or aren't saved, or maybe you have lost fellowship, too, please go back and find Him. For those of you that aren't saved, feel free to contact me via this blog and I will be happy to take the time to try and introduce you to Jesus. If there are any of you that, because of my testimony, this blog, this road I never knew I had the strength to travel with God or even by myself, if because of this you have given your life to Jesus, I would really, really love to hear about it from you. I may have slipped up a bit, but I don't want to fail in what God has chosen to use me for.
Again, thank you one and all from the bottom of my heart, or is that the heart of my bottom? :o) for standing with Lori and I with your prayers. You have NO idea what it means to have more than just my very small family standing with me. Again, thank you, thank you, thank you. In the name of Jesus Christ, Shalom.
Mike
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